10/11/2009

The RPG top ten for this week is...

The Top Ten Ways to Know Your Campaign Sucks

10) Everyone meets in a tavern.

9) A dark robed man enters the tavern looking for "adventurers".

8) There's a fight in the tavern. Because every fantasy world has all of its taverns filled to the brim with mercenaries, thieves and assholes just looking to fight anyone who happens to be around, regardless of the consequences.

7) The only thing that the players remember from the last session is the pizza, and it wasn't that great.

6) Your NPC's are way more important than your PC's. Its your world by jebus, and you don't want "players" screwing it up.

5) Your Elf/Dwarf hybrid race the Dwelves are not well received. No one recognizes original ideas anymore.

4) You're using the world of Synnibarr for your campaign.

3) For dramatic effect you demand that players dress and speak as their characters when they enter the games room in your house... and by games room in your house, I mean the alcove under the stairs in your Mom's basement.

2) At the end of the night the table is obscured by a massive dice fort constructed during play.

1) You're this guy.

If you are guilty of any these RPG crimes you need to turn in your GM's badge and find your local division of  bad GM's anonymous and get some help.

5 comments:

  1. The first three are cheesy good fun. Just because people want a game where they can kick ass and take names without thinking too hard doesn't mean the game sucks.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Actually my group likes the occasional gratuitous bar brawl. Maybe the difference is that they are brawls as opposed to armed combat.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Swordgleam... I'm all for kicking ass and taking names without thinking too much. Unless of course you're referring to the world of Synnibarr reference, because I can't not think enough to make that a good game.

    Oz... I'm also being a little facetious with this post. We all like bar fights, its cliche and silly, but good fun from time to time.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Swordgleam... I'm all for kicking ass and taking names without thinking too much. Unless of course you're referring to the world of Synnibarr reference, because I can't not think enough to make that a good game.

    Oz... I'm also being a little facetious with this post. We all like bar fights, its cliche and silly, but good fun from time to time.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Actually my group likes the occasional gratuitous bar brawl. Maybe the difference is that they are brawls as opposed to armed combat.

    ReplyDelete

Thanks for commenting at Rule of the Dice.